Guest- Susan Santoro Whether you are single or in a relationship this is gold!

Have you ever wondered what it takes to find the love of your life?
Is it your dream to find a life partner who will cherish, love and adore you?

Love is a force more formidable than any other. It is invisible. It cannot be seen or measured. Yet it is powerful enough to transform you in a moment. And offers you more joy than any material possessions ever could. There may be no other word that is so loaded with meaning, emotion, opinion, fear, heartbreak, joy or ecstasy. Yet, in the human experience there is also nothing more important. We can have amazing children, a great job, healthy body, financial abundance and spirituality- and yet, without someone to share it all with, our lives have less meaning and fulfilment.

Experiencing a deep, profound love allows you to revolutionise every aspect of your life.

At Life by Creation we believe that in order to create and experience an extraordinary, tremendous, fulfilling relationship, you must first work on being the one- to find the one.

Creating the relationship that will transform your life may not just ‘happen’- but inside of you, right in this very moment, you do have the power to find, create, and reconnect with the love of a lifetime.

You have to overcome your fears, be more aware of who you are at your true core, and master the skills and disciplines that will transform your existing relationships-, your future relationships – and your entire life.
Step 1: Letting Go

Take a moment to think about a past relationship where you really, really hoped that they were the “one.” It can be really digging deep into your past, or perhaps as early as this year. Ok- once you can get past the visuals and giggles of the old hairstyle you were sporting- and memories of that old flame… I’ll bet you are now happy that your wishes for him to ‘be the one’ didn’t come true. Sometimes we have to let go of what we think we want or need- in order to let the divine timing of the Universe work in our favour. Let’s face it; we can’t control anything in life except our own thoughts, feelings and emotions. Although I do admit- sometimes it would be nice to!
I have found that the key to letting go – is to trust that I can be clear about everything I want (love, happiness, fulfilment) without having to be obsessive about it. Let go of your need to be the boss of the Universe, let go of the past, and live in gratitude for the love and happiness that you have in your life right now, trusting that more is on the way.
Step 2: It’s about coming home

One of the best things about sharing your life with your soul mate is having a life filled with unconditional love. Soul mates are often each other’s best friend and as such the relationship becomes a “place to come home to’ when life becomes difficult or stressful or scary. This “place to come home to” is both a physical place in your home as well as an emotional space in the relationship.

While you are in the process of becoming a magnet for love, create a physical space in your home right now that is your emotional ‘place to come home to’. It can be as simple as your favourite chair in the bedroom, relaxing in your bathtub or a new loveseat under a tree in your backyard. Use this space on a daily basis to focus your attention on your intention for attracting your ‘Love Affair’ to you.

On the emotional side, have a think about whether you are ready to create this space for your Love Affair to happen right now. Remember, the process of manifesting a soul mate is one of making space for him on all levels of your being and in all areas of your life.

Step 3: We get what we focus on
Do you know that more people put more time and energy into planning their next holiday than they do planning their life? Think about the last time you researched your holiday or recent travels. Chances are, you probably knew before you went to the Travel Agent that you wanted the holiday to be tropical, or adventure filled, or Cultural with sightseeing, right? And, you may even have had a budget in mind. And, I’ll bet that once you spent some time searching for that particular type of holiday- that you eventually found the perfect destination.

You were able to manifest your holiday because you had a clear vision of what you were looking for. Manifesting a soul mate can be nearly as effortless if you first have a clear vision of what he or she will be like.
First begin with the physical traits and make a specific list that includes age range, height/weight range and appearance.
Next, begin to list the qualities of the personality that most appeals to you. Finally, and most importantly, add to this list descriptions of how you will feel in this relationship. Take a moment to close your eyes and imagine how you feel as you are walking through life with this special person. Do you feel love, cherished and adored? Do you feel connected, trusting, joyful and serene? Breathe into these feelings while visualizing your new life with your soul mate.

Step 4: Making way for the new

Ever notice that right after you spring clean your wardrobe you find yourself shopping for new clothes?

In order to attract your dream man- your Love Affair- you must create positive space in your life. It is now time to clear out the old relationships. Obviously if you are dating someone or in a relationship that’s not working, it’s time to cleanly and responsibly end it. For those of you who are single, look and see who you might be still be hooked on and find a way to move on. And, for those of you who are totally free and ready to commit BUT are still having casual sex with the neighbour, the ex-lover or whoever you meet out on a Sat night…it’s time to let that go as well. By focusing all of your energy – sexual and otherwise – on manifesting your ideal mate you will send the Universe a clear message that you are ready and there is nothing and no other ‘body’ standing in the way.

Step 5: Harnessing the Power of Masculine and Feminine Energy

I absolutely love the saying- Opposites attract. I use this saying with my clients at least 10 times a day!
In science, the attraction of opposites is called polarity. In human relationships, many types of polarity also exist- we are attracted to those things in people which are different to what we find in ourselves; they stimulate emotions and sensations that are different from the way we stimulate ourselves. In romantic intimacy, polarity refers to the play between opposite energies- the masculine and the feminine. They are responsible for sexual attraction and passion.
Do you have a role model for polarity in romance? Who is your ideal couple? The old saying “if I can see it I can believe it,” is valid because for most people, as “seeing is believing.” If there isn’t a couple in your life that demonstrates the type of Love Affair you plan to have, then identify a couple you don’t know to focus on. My favourite couple are Noah and Allie from the movie The Notebook. It’s a sentimental movie for me that really touches my heart and reminds me of what it was like growing up to witness my parent’s own Love Affair. Start to study successful partnerships and look for what you want in your Love Affair- don’t focus on what you don’t want. Start looking for couples to admire and learn from.
Step 6: Decide

Make the choice right now. Decide that you are ready, willing and available for your Love Affair.

Allow yourself to really “feel” what it feels like to be deeply loved and connected. Meditate on it. Curl up at night in bed for a few moments and notice the feelings of what it will be like to have your Love Affair. What will it look like, smell like, and feel like? What will you be telling yourself? Remember the unconscious mind doesn’t recognise the difference between what has really happened and what is made up- that is what the Law of Attraction is based on!

Know with every part of your being that the one that you are longing for is on the way to you right now. Be open to meeting and dating. Take the first steps and begin preparing your new life to include him in it! When you have cleared the clutter from your heart and mind, get over your reservations about being single and enquire about our exclusive Dinners with a Difference. If you don’t feel ready for that (yet!) give us a call at Life by Creation for some one of one relationship coaching! We only have one life!

What did you learn?

We believe what we want to believe.

I see that you are a courageous person.

I know that sometimes it feels like you’re a little bit different to your friends, your family. You have thoughts and visions about what you want to do with your life, you feel like there is more but you don’t know where or how to start. Sometimes it feels like it’s not going to happen in this lifetime.

One thought, one action, one step that’s all it takes.

You have a dream to make a difference; to your life, your kids life and all those around you. It’s a life, a legacy and although most people don’t “get” it you know I do and all those who are blessed to have you in their lives.

Do what you want to do, be who you want to be.

Let me tell you a secret…

I have a fear, my biggest fear. It’s not spiders or snakes, they don’t scare me.

My fear has fuelled my life to take action and just do it.

My biggest fear is waking up when I am 80 years old and thinking “I should have done that”

So I do, and sometimes it’s scary and sometimes I think and wonder why I do this to myself. But when something arrives in me inbox and I have changed someone’s life today or someone tells me “I am still inspired by your event” that’s why, it’s clear now and that makes up for the times I ask myself why.

We get one life, one opportunity.

Where are you now and where do you want to go?

Dream Big, Think Big, Act Big.

Bipolar Is Under-diagnosed

Perhaps the reason that Bipolar depression is increasingly hitting the headline is in part due to a realisation within the medical profession that it is hugely under-diagnosed. Moves are being made to make doctors more aware of the condition, and spot the symptom earlier. As with many syndromes, symptoms are open to interpretation and can present over a number of years – or conversely present so rapidly that they are missed altogether. Not easy to spot then. But that doesn’t mean it’s impossible. So just what are the symptoms doctors look out for when trying to diagnose bipolar disorder?

Type I & Type II Bipolar Disorder

Type I Bipolar disorder is what used to be termed ‘manic depression’. This is easier for doctors to spot because the symptoms are fairly extreme. The sufferer’s moods can change from deep depression to wild elation, and extreme, destructive behaviour. Britney Spear’s ‘meltdown’ was a classic example of a bipolar sufferer in trouble. Her reckless, wild and self-destructive behaviour showed someone totally out of control, and unable to look after themselves. But whilst it makes headline fodder for tabloids, a genuine tragedy was playing out before our eyes. If she had been a friend of y

ours and not a celebrity she would have had our compassion. Her condition led to her losing custody of her children, shaving off her hair and humiliating herself, in public, before the world’s paparazzi. All the time she was suffering from a debilitating illness, which was driving her actions, and from which she was powerless to control. But compare Britney then to Britney now. She’s calm, in control and back on the tour circuit. She has her children back and is in a successful relationship. This is a testament to the efficacy of bipolar medication, which can be highly effective. So let’s look at some typical symptoms of this condition.

Bipolar Symptoms – ‘Manic’ phase

• A heightened sense of self-importance or ‘grandiosity’
• An exaggerated positive disposition
• A decreased need for sleep, and difficulty sleeping
• Poor appetite
• Weight loss
• Racing speech, thoughts and flights of ideas
• Impulsive, risk-taking behaviour – excessive drinking, promiscuity etc
• Poor concentration and easy distractibility
• Vastly increased activity level
• Excessive involvement in pleasurable activities
• Poor financial choices and ill-advised spending sprees
• Excessive irritability
• Aggressive behavior

Bipolar Symptoms – ‘Depressive phase

• Deep feelings of sadness or hopelessness
• A loss of interest in pleasurable activities
• No longer interested in previous interests
• Difficulty in sleeping
• Early-morning waking
• A loss of energy; constant lethargy and low activity
• Feelings of guilt; low self-esteem
• Difficulty concentrating; memory loss
• Negative thoughts about the future
• Weight gain; weight loss
• Thinking or talking about suicide or death

That’s quite a list of suffering isn’t it? It’s not something anyone would want to lay claim to, celebrity or not. The difficulty with this list, and the diagnosis of the condition is that it’s not quite as clear cut as the list suggests, which is why it has been missed by so many doctors.

Type I & Type II Bipolar

The list above seems pretty clear cut. In Bipolar Type I they can present as such, with great highs and great lows, which are clearly distinguishable. We can notice – as with Britney – the erratic and self-destructive behaviour. Buying a new suit when you’re on welfare, believing you can conquer the world and taking unholy risks with your safety are hard for friends and family to ignore. But Bipolar Type II is more subtle. Patients usually present to their doctor in the depressive phase, which is why they are diagnosed with simple depression. The ‘manic’ phase is less common and less extreme in Type II Bipolar, and this is why it is so often missed. Depression is the most common and pervasive symptom. When the depression lifts, a heightened mood is seen as a natural consequence of this, and overlooked. These mood shifts – known as ‘cycles’ – can be rapid, sometimes several in a day or a week – and this is another reason that they are missed. Whilst it would be easy to dismiss Bipolar II as a ‘milder’ version of ‘Manic Depression’, the opposite is in fact true. Bipolar II sufferers have been shown to have worse outcomes over their lifetime, and be much more at risk of suicide than Bipolar I sufferers. It is certainly not an illness to be ignored.

The Good News

If a doctor is able to question the patient closely and in detail, hopefully the condition can be diagnosed accurately. The good news is that bipolar responds extremely well to drug treatments. Drugs which are used to treat epilepsy are found to be highly effective in re-establishing evenness and balance in moods, allowing the sufferer to regain control of their lives and enjoy the things that other people take for granted.

Next time you see that a celebrity has been diagnosed with Bipolar disorder, just remember Britney, losing her children and losing control. It’s no joke, and sufferers deserve our support and encouragement until the right treatment for their condition can be found. And if you suspect that your depression may have been misdiagnosed, mention it to your doctor and ask for a proper assessment. Don’t suffer in silence.

Some great resources are available at The Black Dog Institute and Madam Bipolar has an incredible blog you must check out.

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Amy Watts is a professional writer and amateur motivational speaker. While her work covers all aspects of healthy living (both body and mind) and works with a number of eco-friendly companies, she also has a sideline in travel writing and can frequently be found sunning herself on Mediterranean cruises and enjoying a cocktail or two at sandy beach bars.

Our heads are filled with so much noise about what to do and what not to do.

Honest thinking, honest parenting and honest about your life’s expectations, the judgements, our mindset and how or why money distorts and clouds judgements, thoughts and vision.

It’s just noise. Know it for what it is. It’s not real.

Authenticity of who you are and what you represent to have humility of your inner self.

To have a conversation, what are you thinking about, what conversation do what to have and surround yourself with those people.

• Being able to know when to take timeout to prepare yourself to transcend
• Being able to know when to know when to transcend
• Being ready

Call me crazy but sometimes I like having my blinkers on and not knowing what’s going on in the blogging or business world because you can get so caught up in “stuff” that isn’t even your own, then you judge people and really who are we to judge. People see what they want to see and say what they want to say, I stayed clear for many years of “Mummy Bloggers” because I heard it was “clicky” and sometimes “bitchy” and I felt like I didn’t “fit”.  I am not a “Mummy blogger” and I am not sure anyone is?

No one is defined by any “one” thing, being a mum isn’t who I am. It’s just that I happen to have children. Everyone has a voice and everyone has the right to be heard.

Clicky? You see what you want to see…

I see a group of incredible woman who want to make a difference.

I see women befriend women and support each other because isn’t that what friends do?

I see women who understand each other and their vision.

I see women respect each other for being different.

I see a variety of women with different personalities who each hold a piece to puzzle and who come together to complete the picture.

You fucking rock!

I am grateful to have the chance to meet the gorgeous Nikki from Styling You who is just lovely and such an intelligent, funny and inspiring woman.

I am grateful to have sat next too Stacey from Veggie Mama and we could discussed our love of Quorn

I am grateful for Mrs Woog taking that ridiculously funny picture of Penny, oh that makes me laugh just thinking about it.

I am blessed to have had such an amazing conversation with Nikki and Edenland over breakfast…even if it was incredibly deep for first thing in the morning and the morning after…

Humble by the being able to embrace what is…

Find YOU and be YOU in every way, everyday.

1. All starts within first, value innocence thru that brings wisdom, truth brings trust and creativity, generosity brings satisfaction, courage opens our hearts also allows us to be responsible, Forgiveness is vital for everything!!!
2. Open mindedness = non judgement!! I don’t want my children growing up thinking that they r better or less then others, so I never bitch comment or encourage my children to finger point, isolate tease others for there fortune or misgivings…
3. Innocence, truth, generosity, courage, kindness/sweet words, forgiveness.
4. Compassion, respect, humility
5. Infinite wisdom from within
6. Confidence, honesty, trust

What incredible values to have and to pass on!

Some more subtle ways is to encourage them to watch and read age appropriate movies and books. So we are having a Disney Giveaway to celebrate such an amazing topic.

1 DVD Pack including a copy of The Lion King 2 & 3 AND 8 x 21 Saxon Binoculars

TOTAL PRIZE VALUE $148.90

Tell us in the comments below what you love about the Lion King.

Entries close 27th April 2012

You can download a Lion King activity sheet here or  download a Lion King Color sheet

It’s the small things we do that have the most impact on our lives.

1. Make a vision board- This is an incredibly powerful tool that gives you clarity and direction. Even if you don’t know what you want this will help you discover your goals. Therefore it’s a great starting point in the process. It can be as big or as little as you like, what is important in this process is not to think about it just cut out images and phrases that grab your attention.  Hang it in a place you will see it frequently.

2. Create a mission statement- A paragraph of how you want to live your life, how much money you want to make, how it will be delivered to you, your values etc.
3. Write down your goals and everything you want to accomplish by when.
4. In an affirmation say what your goal is as if it is happening, for example if you want to lose weight you could say something like “I love that I lose weight easily and I am enjoying the new slender me and how I feel”
5. Visualise it all happening, with you in the picture, like it’s happening right now.
6. Believe, trust that it will happen.
7. Take action!

Secondly, you may know it but do you practice it, live it, be it?

• We all know we should eat healthy?
• We all know smoking is bad for us?
• We all know we should exercise?

And that’s how we justify it to ourselves because we tell ourselves we know…

For years I believed knowledge is power. I was wrong knowledge means jack shit if you don’t actually DO anything.

Sound familiar?

1. I know all the personal development stuff and I know why- Yes you may have listened to a Tony Robbins tape or completed and P & D course but unless you’re living in that space doing, thinking and being what you need to be. It means nothing.

2. I know I’ve moved on- You can tell yourself that you’ve moved on from something but the truth is if you’re still talking about it then you haven’t moved on.

3. I know it’s not me it’s everybody else… accountability. Stop blaming others it’s not their fault and the more you bang on about it being someone’s fault you’re just trying to make yourself feel better because the buck stops with you.

The only way to move forward is to have an honest conversation with yourself, the you that really “gets” it and really wants to move through it and live your life.

What is normal? I don’t think such a thing exists….or rather it does however it has endless meanings.

In a world where mixed messages are at an all time high, as is our judgements, the level of  obesity, the level of depression, the level of suicide, the level of bullying and the level of eating disorders. Tell me what is normal? Tell me what messages are we sending to younger generations?

Never before has there been such a highly educated generation, these people are smart, they are kind and they are important. Why are we trying to distort their vision?

1. We are a “healthy” school however we sell junk in the canteen.
2. We have “real” models in this magazine yet not one is above a size 8
3. We are a TV show kids can relate too however everyone on it is drop dead gorgeous.
4. You’re allowed to express yourself as long as you adhere to our endless guidelines
5. You’re obese because you watch too much TV and don’t get outside but you make me feel like an outsider if I don’t have these “things”
6. You are beautiful just the way you are but let me just fix your hair, change that top, pluck this hair and pop that pimple.
7. You are beautiful just the way you are just don’t dare go over a size 10.

What is normal?

1. Normal is a teenager having pimples
2. Normal is people to be born with birthmarks
3. Normal is children losing their teeth
4. Normal is children to arrive home scruffy after playing all day
5. Normal is children to be high one minute and crying the next.
6. Normal is for us to come in all sizes, all shapes and all colors.
7. Normal is children experimenting  to find themselves

And don’t fucking take that away from them with your unrealistic expectations.

Shocked, disgusted and appalled am I to find that there is a retouching service on school photos, so you’re beautiful as long as you look this way. The school photos with the massive pimple, the toothless smile are the ones you remember…. They are the ones that make you smile.

If your child has acute acne it’s nothing to be ashamed of it makes them special, if your child has an obvious birthmark that’s what makes them special and if other people judge them for that then that is their own insecurities.

Beautiful is a child who shines brightly from the inside, let them shine. If we spent half as much time focusing on what’s going on inside our children as we do focusing on the outside maybe depression in children wouldn’t be at an all time high.

Focus on what matters.

It is my aim to guide and support them in their journeys, to understand it is their journey and not my own nor what I think they should do. Knowing that it is a combination of my core values, their Fathers values and their own values which will be discovered over time.

Is it something you think about?

My top 5 values I would like to install in my children:

1. Respect- I try to teach my children to respect themselves and others, even if they think different respect the freedom of choice,
2. Love- I want to show my girls and lead by example what being in a healthy relationship entails.
3. Gratitude- To be grateful for everything we have in our lives because we are blessed.
4. Abundance- They have everything available to them, to think big, dream big and when they say “I have no money” I say “You have heaps of money and what are you going to do to get that …..”. Abundance is also happiness, laughter and good times.
5. Listen- Listen to yourself and to others, when they feel lost and emotional I encourage them to stop, breathe and just be. Everyone deserves to be heard so we should listen when someone is speaking to us.

I watched The Help recently and while it’s an easy watching movie it is also very thought provoking. Something that sparked my interest and melted my heart was

“You is smart, You is kind, You is important”

What values do you think are important?

She knew what she wanted but didn’t know how she was going to do it. Therefore everything looked great and she wanted to do everything. What she didn’t realise is that every time she changed course she had to start again, there were a lot of starts. As happy and as free this life made her there was always a feeling of wonder “am I ever going to be content.”

“Things” made her happy.

A nice bag, a divine pair of shoes, new sunglasses and the bigger and the shinier the bling the better. Everything had to be big, the bigger the better. One day she realised that buying “things” big and small only fills the void in your life until the newness wears off. Then you’re looking for the next “thing” to take its place.

If she really wanted to “do” that “thing” she really wanted to do then there is only one way it was going to happen.

See, commit, do and the most important part to this equation is to trust.

Trust Yourself

Trust the process

Trust that everything will unfold exactly how it’s suppose to.

With this new unconditional trust she had the confidence to make a plan, persist and in return fly. But what was that “thing” that transformed her life?

She discovered that there is the biggest, the brightest and the shiniest of “things” inside her. The most precious jewel you will ever find is the one waiting to be discovered inside yourself. Discover that jewel and you get all the answers you need and ensure it always shines bright.